He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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