Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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