so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
