he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
