Best friends brother. Beat that.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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