Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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