We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
