Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
