I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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