He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
