I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
