That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
