TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
