no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
