Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
