I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
