Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
