Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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