she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
