And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
