all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
