Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
