well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
