I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
