I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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