Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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