Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize
