I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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