is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
