WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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