i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Drunk is not a location!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
