Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
