You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
