I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
