how can u be prego again
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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