Do vagina's smell?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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