The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
