This is not my ceiling
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
