writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
