I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
