i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
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