sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
