Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
