Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
