fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
