Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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