I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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