were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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