Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
