Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
