Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
